Exhausted on the spectrum

I've read a lot of books written about the Autistic Spectrum and Asperger's and notice that many people with these conditions get exhausted a lot. This is said to be because trying to be "normal" takes so much more effort for us than for neurotypical people.

  I get more tired than everyone I know, including my mum who is 85. It is embarrassing at times. For example recently my sister wanted me to come to a concert with her. It was really enjoying it but at the half way interval (around 9 pm) I was overwhelmed with exhaustion and had to apologise and go home. She was understandably quite shocked.

I can do an energetic things for short periods but tend to need long recovery times.

When I get into a subject - like family history- I can do it for hours and hours at a time with intense concentration - far more than most people can. But then I burn out - it might be months later but then my brain just seizes and refuses to work for me. Not ideal when trying to hold down an office job!

Most tiring is social events - visiting an aunt for a weekend, a family do or similar. It can leave me wiped out mentally and physically for a day or two sometimes which is very frustrating. I think its to do with the effort the drive and the interactions with people take. I need a huge amount of social down time.

A few hours physical activity leaves me exhausted to the point that I just can't even watch TV. I have to sleep that moment and not a moment later, its almost like being really ill and is bizarre. When I get this tired there is no arguing with it, everything just shuts down.

I have to really make myself stop sometimes. I work from home so this is easier than for some. Half an hours break morning and afternoon, a whole hour at lunch, and stop everything at 4 pm (until I have to make tea!). I'm trying to rest properly on Sundays. It does give me more energy for the following week.

I have a wheel suggesting ideas for how I feel and also ideas for fixes. It was given to me by the clinical psychologist who diagnosed Aspergers for me. I don't find it easy to recognise lower levels of tiredness, I just feel I can't cope. I do find this wheel very helpful but I do feel quite thick for not being able to do this process more automatically.

I feel:
Unmotivated
Demoralised
discouraged
Sleepy
Exhausted
Tired

Therefore I need;
Time alone
To take a break
To set time limits on the work I need to do
Rest
Sleep
Watch a light film - escapism
To thikk of my acheivements
Be kind to myself
Be patient with myself

Here is a link I found on the subject

http://adultswithautism.org.uk/autism-tiredness/




Take care
Caroline x

To learn more about me and Caroline's Cottage Gardens please visit my website. https://sites.google.com/site/carolinescottagegardens/

Zentangle Garden

With proverb!

Zentangle can be so relaxing to do - better than drugs I reckon.

I used to meditate for many years which was good but I find it so much easier and better for my anxiety to do something rather than do tricks with my mind. Zentangle was a real find!

Its cheap too - a very fine ink pen costs only around £2.50 - and any scraps of reasonably absorbent paper. Lots of patterns online - particularly on Pinterest to copy too.

Caroline
x



To learn more about me and Caroline's Cottage Gardens please visit my website. https://sites.google.com/site/carolinescottagegardens/

Cleaner House, Less Stress!

Hi there.

I have a sister who is 16 years younger than me and juggling work and young children and supporting a partner with a demanding career. She is encouraging me to share my method which has helped her so much. It seems obvious - but it makes such a difference. I promise!

I don't like cleaning!
I tend to put it off until the house is looking horrendous and its become a huge job
I don't have time for "spring cleaning" - windows, Cupboards - you know the sort of thing.
My sister was the same.


Cleaning an be a job that seems never ending - your home appears to always be filthy to you - this is about setting a limit to how much you do and being happier with what you have done. Its also about knowing that your house is cleaned to an acceptable standard and that you can rest!

So I adapted my cleaning list for her that I've used for years. She has found it invaluable and is quite evangelical about it to friends and family.

How to .....

For each room you list all the jobs that need doing including those that you think are spring cleaning jobs - hoover, mop, windows in and out, dust, clean out cupboards, mirrors, sink, bath, shower, doors, skirting boards, dado rails, cobwebs, change sheets, bath the dog, gardening, ironing, etc.

Then you think how often in a month you really need to do each task. The aim is to do each task as seldom as possible (to reduce work and stress) whilst keeping the house at a standard of cleaning you want. For example I feel that most rooms only want hovering once a week but some areas of the house - hall, kitchen, lounge, stairs, which get a lot of traffic might need a second hovering.

The more detailed the list - tasks broken down into small units - the more you will want to do them as in just a few spare minutes you can choose a few very short jobs to do and then. enjoy crossing them off  your list.  By the end of the week you will be amazed at how much you have achieved by just a few minutes at a time.

Some jobs you may want to set a manageable time limit to to encourage you to do it little and often -for example half an hour in the garden.

Sometimes you may also want to set yourself a time target per day for cleaning - for example half an hour. Setting a small amount of time often means you get more done. Not setting an amount of time often means that it takes ages and more and more appears to need doing as you look critically around your house.

Keep the list on your computer so you can print a new one off each month and adapt as you need.

Below is an excerpt from my own list you might like to use as a template.

Do give it a try - it makes such a difference!

Let me know if you found it helpful

JOBS TO DO

Wc monday	Wc monday	Wc monday	Wc monday	Wc monday
Kitchen Surfaces and sink Dust Wipe chairs vacuum mop Clean out a cupboard	Kitchen Surfaces and sink vacuum mop Low cupboard fronts cobwebs	Kitchen Surfaces sink vacuum Mop Windows	Kitchen Surfaces and sink High cupboard fronts Vacuum mop	Kitchen Surfaces and sink Vacuum  mop Skirting Doors
Landing Handrails vacuum	Landing Door vacuum	Landing Dado rail and light switches, vacuum	Landing Skirting, vacuum cobwebs	Landing Pictures, book case, vacuum
Stairs Vacuum skirting	Stairs vacuum Handrail Wipe over carpet	Stairs vacuum Skirting Marks on walls	Stairs vacuum handrail	Stairs vacuum skirting
Vacuum round	Vacuum round	Vacuum round	Vacuum round	Vacuum round
ironing	ironing	ironing	ironing	ironing

Remember yourself!

Paperwork	Paperwork	Paperwork	Paperwork	Paperwork
Interests	Interests	Interests	Interests	Interests
Relaxation	Relaxation	Relaxation	Relaxation	Relaxation
Social	Social	Social	Social	Social
Exercise	Exercise	Exercise	Exercise	Exercise
Crafts	Crafts	Crafts	Crafts	Crafts

Key words: clean, stress, family, children, cleaning, dusting, vacuuming, save time, efficiency, juggling, self help, spring clean. happy. chores, time saving, reduce stress, cleaner home, home. lifestyle, "work life balance" "reduce stress" housework

Christmas on the spectrum

Hi

I do love Christmas - my favourite time is Christmas Eve. We have tea in front of a real fire accompanied by Carol's from Kings.

To keep my anxiety levels down tea is quite simple as follows:

Nice bread - I like Hovis seed sensations wholemeal
Real butter
Hummus
Cherry tomatos
Free range ham or chicken slices
Good crisps
Peppers ready cooked from a jar in olive oil or similar
Chutney
Tapenade.

People can make any sandwiches they want to out of the above at the table.

Ready made Christmas cake and chocolate log
Clementines
Grapes

Pot of tea ( or in my case redbush as I can't do caffeine)

With the tree lit, everyone round the table, the fire and the carols there is always a little Christmas magic about it all.

To keep my anxiety and even depression at bay - I can't have more than a sip of alchohol, have to watch my blood sugar, no late nights, and also make sure that am assertive about only doing so much socialising with the wider family.

There are 15 of us and mum likes us to be all together every day - but as I find this very stressful I have to be firm that I'll be sociable on Christmas Eve and Christmas day but Boxing day is quite and at home.

I substitute lovely spiced apple fruit teas, or earl grey redbush for the alchohol or make a hot spicy drink with apple juice and I don't miss the alchohol. To keep the blood sugar low I have to make sure I eat equal amounts of mince pie and extra thick cream!! Honestly it works. 

Happy Christmas to you all.

x

Keywords: Autism, ASD, Spectrum, Aspergers, Social Anxiety, Depression Alcohol, Caffeine, Blood sugar, Christmas, Stress,